And We're Back

I realise that I've been neglecting this blog for a while, but hey, I'm back and that's what counts.

I'm coming up on two major events this week. The first would be my first anniversary on Halloween. Can I begin by saying how pleased I am that my anniversary is on Halloween? This is a milestone I never thought I'd be able to reach because I never thought I'd find anyone to get there with, but I have and we're here and I'm happy and he's happy and we're happy together. We're having dinner and then we're watching the movie we went to see on our first date 1 year ago, Hotel Transylvania. His idea. I'm really excited.

The other major event is the kickoff of National Novel Writing Month 2013. I've been trying to figure out what I want to write this year and I had it narrowed down to two. I would either write a sequal to last year's entry, which seemed like an attractive idea because of how much I enjoy the character and how much I've been experimenting with other sequels up until now, even working on one for my creative writing class, or I would write a novelized version of a D&D campaign. I don't think I have enough planning in place to make the D&D one work out, and I always write my other character so naturally that I think I'm going to side with her on this one.

However, I really want to explore this D&D campaign idea. I want to write that story, I want to see how far I can get it to go. I am taking part in a D&D 3.5 campaign that has exploded to epic proportions, each player has 2 characters, one older and of epic level and one younger, most of whom are children of the older characters. Our DM has everything so ornately planned out, I am dumbfounded because I can't come up with that much depth for a story, and that's supposed to be my job to do that. I feel like trying to make this project happen would be good for me as an exercise in story-telling and world-building, as well as a safe place to learn about DMing games. If I could make this project take shape and play out, I might be able to make a real game happen after this, which I think would make Alex (my boyfriend, yes we have the same name) happy, since he got me really deep into this RPG community.

So that's where I'm at right now, I hope any readers who find this again or for the first time are doing well, and I think I might pick this up more seriously again here in the coming months.

-Alexandra

I can't focus in class, and that makes me productive

As strange a concept as this seems to be, I am going to stick with that. I've been more productive in my classes this year than usual and it's not because I'm finally paying attention. In fact, I'm actually paying less attention than ever. So what in God's name am I doing instead?

This is the part where I say that I've been writing the Great Canadian novel in the back of my lectures, but that, too, would be a lie. What I have been doing, is organizing my homework which, although it doesn't look like much, is actually going to make these last two weeks a living hell, especially because I'm aiming to have all the assignments finished long before the last day of classes because the day before that is my birthday. And goddamnit I will not be writing essays on my birthday.

And so, after I've mapped out all of my essays during class time, done a considerable amount of my research in class, and completely revamped my homework schedule for the next two weeks, I'm now going to be starting to write my essays in class.

Granted, as I write this post in class, I am glad that I actually attend class. I was reminded just now of the proposal for my final paper which is due next Wednesday, which I'd completely forgotten about. So now I have an extra assignment to do.

I need to get to work.

The Benefits of Fan Fiction

I feel so incredibly lucky to have been in the fan fiction community for the better part of my life. I'm currently sitting in my creative writing class and we're discussing "The Yellow Wallpaper" by Charlotte Perkins Gilman. We brought up some "strange" things that have happened in other short stories that we've covered, strange things like "necrophilia," "mental illness," and other slightly off-beat, but not off the reservation topics which are so often covered in fan fiction by fearless fangirls everywhere. Everyone else is discussing these things with trepidation and unease, but here I sit going "... so?"

I've been in the fan fiction community for so long now that I've seen, well, slightly less than everything. I'll put it this way: I've ventured into the kink memes, and you can't really escape the weirdness there; it's embrace it or GTFO. Which I did. Embrace it, I mean. I learned a lot about people from that, a knowledge which was built upon when I joined Tumblr and experienced a few choice users who reblog some really thought-provoking stuff.

So now that I'm sitting here in class, discussing necrophilia with my classmates completely comfortable while they shuffle their feet under the desks, I am incredibly glad that I've had this experience on the internet. I've become a stronger, more knowledgable person as a result, and I think that that may be one of my only strengths here in university, my abstract knowledge and ease of comprehension of these kinds of off-beat things that come up so frequently in the English department.

New Year's Post

Hey guys,

So it's 2013. We survived the end of the world (again) and unfortunately that means we actually have to start getting into the swing of a new year. Damn.

I guess I should talk about stuff related to 2012 ending and 2013 starting then. So in my usual style I'm going to do this in the form of a meme. Here we go:

1) Was 2012 a good year for you?
Yes, it was. I did a lot of growing this year.

2) What was your favourite moment of the year?
I think I'll go with "event" over "moment", and that will be getting together with Alex. Best decision I think I've ever made.

3) What was your least favourite moment of the year?
Oh God... honestly I don't know for sure. I've been having a lot of trouble keeping in touch with my friends this year, and I think that's something that I'm going to have to change in the coming months.

4) Where were you when 2012 began? Who were you with?
I was in Joe's basement hanging out with him, Cole, Rachel, and I think James was there, too. I don't think Aaron was at that one, though. I just remember that Joe and I ran off to McDonald's at 4 a.m.

5) Where were you when 2012 ended? Who were you with?
I was in Adrian's basement with him and Alex playing Warhammer Deathwatch. It was glorious.

6) Did you keep your New Year's Resolutions of 2012?
I didn't make any for 2012 because I knew I wouldn't keep them.

7) Do you have a New Year's Resolution for 2013?
Yeah, I want to keep in touch with my friends more and rebuild a few relationships that weren't as strong as they once were. I need to keep people in my life, which is something I've always been bad at. Also, I want to finish my weight-loss goal, I've made it almost halfway, so I'm doing well so far.

8) Did you make any new friends in 2012?
I did, I made friends with Adrian through Alex, and I met a few people through archery.

9) Did you travel outside of the US in 2012?
Considering I live in Canada, yes. New question: Did you travel outside of Canada in 2012? No, I didn't, I didn't get vacation time last year. I get some this year, though, so I'll be using that to adventure.

10) How many different states did you travel to in 2012?
Read: provinces. I didn't travel at all, I stayed in Alberta. I went as far as Banff and Edmonton.

11) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2012?
I did not, thankfully.

12) What was your favourite book you read in 2012?
I really liked "Mr. Pip" by Lloyd Jones. It had such a beautiful outlook on the power of literature and it made me believe more than ever that I'm doing the right thing with my life.

13) What was your favourite movie that you saw in 2012?
I saw... what the hell did I see? "The Avengers", I think was my favourite.

14) What was your favourite TV show that you saw in 2012?
"Downton Abbey" and "Supernatural" were my favourites.

15) What was your favourite music that you heard in 2012?
No shame: One Direction. Their music just makes me happy about life and I think that that's important for me because I haven't been really happy about life for a long time.

16) Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2012?
Not a lot, whenever I felt like, which wasn't more than maybe once or twice a month.

17) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2012?
Not a one. I didn't even end up in the hospital, so I avoided morphine, too!

18) How many people did you date in 2012?
I am so excited that I can finally answer this question with an answer that isn't "no one." I started dating Alex this year. He is the only one and I'm okay with this because of reasons.

19) Did you do anything you were ashamed of this year?
Probably. I don't remember it off hand, but I'm sure I did, I always do.

20) What was the biggest lie you told in 2012?
I don't even know, man. I try not to lie at all. Sometimes I avoid saying anything, but I don't equate silence on a subject to lying about it.

21) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2012?
Hell if I know. I command the same respect I give, so I don't find people lying to me all that often.

22) Did you treat somebody badly in 2012?
If I did, it wasn't intentional. If anything, I've been trying to be really considerate this year because I'm very often not.

23) Did somebody treat you badly in 2012?
No, the people in my life are pretty fantastic.

24) How much money did you spend in 2012?
Probably more than I should have, particularly on food. Who needs to eat?

25) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2012?
I haven't the foggiest. I try to forget those kinds of things.

26) If you could go back and change one thing in 2012, what would it be?
I don't believe in changing the past, I feel like it shapes who I am and I wouldn't want to be any different than I am now.

27) What are your plans for 2013?
I want to get a start on one of my serious books this year. I want to at least make a dent in one of them.

28) What did you do in 2012 that you'd never done before?
I'd never kissed a boy before. I also tried Laser Tag for the first time.

29) Did anyone close to you give birth?
Close-ish: my mom's uncle became a grandfather in the last few days of the year.

30) What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?
My normal answer would be "boyfriend", but since I've crossed that off the list I guess... I want to have some confidence in my potential in my chosen field.

31) What date from 2012 will remain etched in your memory and why?
Hallowe'en. My first date. And from now on, our agreed upon anniversary. My life is awesome.

32) What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I won NaNoWriMo. Don't know if I mentioned that in an earlier post, but I did it. 51001 words in the month of November. I have actually written a book. I'm not a wanna-be writer anymore!

33) What was your biggest failure?
I'm not trying hard enough at school. I know that's a huge pitfall and I plan on fixing that.

34) What was the best thing you bought?
My Sherlock teas.

35) Whose behaviour merited celebration?
I feel like mine did, I wasn't a massive bitch this year! Or at least, not as much as I was other years. I am improving.

36) Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
Someone who I'm closer than I ever like admitting.

37) Compared to this time last year are you:
i) happier or sadder: happier for sure!
ii) thinner or fatter: thinner by 24 lbs.
iii) richer or poorer: poorer but only because of Christmas debt.

38) What do you wish you'd done more of?
Living. I only cared about school, work, and the internet this year. I want to have more fun in 2013.

39) What do you wish you'd done less of?
Pointless browsing on the internet. If I was going to be on the computer it could at least have been productive writing.

40) How did you spend Christmas?
At home with my family and my brother's godmother and her husband. It was lovely.

41) What did you do on your birthday and how old were you?
I got my girlfriends together and we went to Milestone's for dinner. I turned 19.

42) What was your personal fashion concept in 2012?
Somewhere between hipster, modern, and... I'll call it "Edwardian Fusion". It was a good year for fashion.

43) What kept you sane?
Probably Tumblr.

44) Which celebrity figure did you admire the most?
Josh Hutcherson. He's been saying things about people being gay and how it doesn't matter in the least and I think that people need to start listening and get their heads out of their asses.

45) What news story do you remember most from 2012?
The recent shooting in America where 27 kids were killed is one that comes to mind.

46) Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012.
If you learn to love yourself as you are on your own, you will end up being happier and more able to function normally in a relationship. My father told my mother this when they started dating and she's been telling it to me since. I realized this year that there is more truth in that than I imagined.

47) Quote a song lyric.
"This place was in horrible shape,
And no one wanted to see,
But that's when,
Hope rose up again,
To shake us all from our sleep.
And we woke up singing,
Get up, get up, there's time, there's time,
Get up, get up, and fight, and fight,
Get up, get up, and see the light,
That was on the day,
The day we saved the world." - Sarah Slean, "The Day We Saved The World"


Well, there's my New Year's post, I don't expect anyone to have read through that, I know I won't be re-reading it, so, yeah.

Have a good 2013, everyone, and I'll see you when I see you.

~Alexandra

The Night Immediately Following Christmas

Hello there,

Long time no see, eh? I'm sorry I've been gone for so long, but it's probably for the best. I fell into a deep bout of fangirling to keep myself warm at night since I last posted, so it wasn't a pretty thing to watch.

Things have been looking up recently, though. For instance, I've gotten myself a boyfriend. His name is, if you'll believe me, also Alex. He is excellent. We've been dating since Halloween. He's an amazing guy, he's smart, funny, extremely chivalrous, and overall a really nice guy. And he thinks I'm funny. And pretty. What is happening to my life?!

I wrote a book. Yeah, I never thought I'd say it either. I wrote a 221 page, 51,001 word manuscript in November for NaNoWriMo. It's a ghost story. It's crap. It need major revisions, but I think that I might be able to make something out of it if I actually sit down to work on it some. But hey, getting the first one punched out is the best place to start, right?

I'm making leaps and bounds in my German courses as well, I can carry on a semi-intelligent conversation with my father, a native German, and he says I'm doing really well, so I think that's the seal of approval. I'm very excited about this because it's been my plan for a long time to run away to Germany and hang out there for a while to interact with my people and be awesome for a while. It'll be much easier to do that if I can speak the language before I go in the first place.

I think that's about it for now, I'm just playing around with the iPad I inherited from my father for Christmas before I go to bed. I've got an 8 hour shift tomorrow (technically today, Boxing Day) after which I'm running off to the airport to pick up Alex, who's coming home from Montreal where he spent the holidays. And so I will say goodnight, as I should probably be somewhat alert for tomorrow.

I hope you guys have had a good year and I will try to get back to posting more frequently in the future.

All the best,
~Alexandra

So much for that...

Hey guys,

So much for trying to make this blog more fun eh? I never have anything cool to talk about. And for that I apologize.

In addition, I did my laundry and an English essay today. I also got called in to work at one of our other stores.

Someday something interesting will happen to me.

~Alexandra

Now that that's over with...

Hello again.

It's been all of, what, 30 seconds? Awesome.

As I promised, I'm going to make this a little bit more fun. And by fun, I mean I'm going to do a meme, since I enjoy doing those and the one I have chosen will let you get to know a little bit more about me. I'm a fangirl. And an insatiable one at that. And I'm not sorry. So what I'm going to do is one of those 30 day memes but I'm going to do it all in one go so that the pain is over in one day instead of in a month. Like a band-aid. A really big band-aid.

Here we go.

Day 01 – Your favorite all-time fandom(s)

I love Sherlock Holmes more than I have words to express. It is quite simply perfection.

Day 02 – Your current fandom

I'm not particularly proud of this one, but I've been gripped with the "infection" as it's come to be called and you know what? It's actually a fun place to be, this side of Tumblr. It's squishy and innocent (ish), like kittens and yarn and candy. With a heaping pile of latent homosexuality.

 

Day 03 – First fandom, the one that made you the fangirl you are today

I don't even know how I got from here to anywhere else. This was a fuzzy and confusing period of my life and I'm not really sure how I managed to gain relative normalcy after this.

But damn if Matt Dillon isn't the finest thing to happen to the 80s.

 

Day 04 –First, current, or favorite fandom crush

I love John so much. He's perfect. He's obtuse, he's prone to bouts of rage, and, frankly, he's a hedgehog. But I love him. And he loves Sherlock.

 

Day 05 – Your fandom secret

Directioners know what this means.

 

Day 06 –Favorite song that brings fangirl tears to your eyes

The Supernatural fandom is going to kill me, I swear to God.

 

Day 07 – Your OTP(s)

This is the only pairing that needs to exist. Yes, there are many others that are adorable and angsty and awesome, but these two... these two. Their love spans centuries.

 

Day 08 – A fandom that you thought you wouldn’t get sucked into, but ended up getting sucked into anyway

These 5 homosexuals are ruining my life. I blame Sam for this.

 

Day 09 – One of your favorite characters

This man is a class A badass. You go Greg Lestrade! And isn't he pretty to boot?

 

Day 10 – Your favorite scene or moment from one of your favorite fandoms

Sherlock: If you were dying, if you were being murdered, what would your last thought be?
John: Please, God, let me live.
Sherlock: Oh, use your imagination!
John: I don't have to.
Sherlock: *sudden bout of empathy*

Day 11 – The fan art, fan fiction, cover song, cosplay, etc. that you’ve made that you’re most proud of

This is the only thing I have made since my fanfiction excursion back in the early years of my teenagehood. I really like this, actually.

 

Day 12 – Your favorite fanartist or fanfiction writer

This girl is awesome. Her Sherlock art is incomperable. Also, her. But her style is a bit more... flowery, I'll say. Still excellent.

 

Day 13 – The best cosplayers of your fandom that you’ve seen; the ones you consider to be real-life versions of your favorite characters, OTP, etc.

There's another set from the "Gotta Be You" video which is also adorable.

 

Day 14 – A group of characters from one of your fandoms you’d love to hang out with for a day

Dean's in this scene, too, he's next to Bobby. I'd love to have an adventure with these dudes.

 

Day 15 –Your favorite collectible/merchandise from your fandom that you most cherish, or one that you wished you owned

It's not merchandise, but I'd love to have an anti-possession tattoo. It's actually really cool.

 

Day 16 – A quote from one of your fandoms that you love

"Dean, you're confusing reality with porn again." -Sam Winchester, Supernatural

 

Day 17 – Your favorite piece of art, be it original or a fan art, from your favorite fandom

I really like this one, by ~br0-Harry on deviant art.

Day 18 – An instance where you turned a friend into a fangirl

When Larry Stylinson. I hate these people. They are ruining my life. See, I've successfully avoided bandom in the past because I feel like that's slightly creepier than normal fandom activity but then these flaming homosexuals happened and now all of my hard work has gone down the tubes. Thanks guys.

 

Day 19 – A theory (be it legitimate or completely crack) that you have always had about one of your fandoms

Mystrade. They have never shared a scene. They apparently exchanged words off camera in "Hounds of Baskerville"(2x2) but that's it. And yet I am convinced that Mycroft is making Lestrade his bitch.

 

Day 20 – A character from a fandom whose clothes, hair, or features you’ve always admired

Louis Tomlinson. He's pretty much the male version of me. Only prettier. Damn him!

 

Day 21 – A moment, character, quote –ANYTHING- from one of your fandoms that had a great impact on your life

This scene between Sam and Dean. Dean only has one year left to live so he decides to teach Sam about cars because that's what big brothers are supposed to do. This scene made me realize what a terrible big sister I actually am and that I should be better to my little brother. Who's 9 inches taller than me. Sound familiar, Dean?

 

Day 22 – How you first got into being a fangirl

Although The Outsiders was my first fandom it wasn't until these two mofos came into my life that I started to legitimately fangirl. I still ship them like there's no tomorrow.

 

Day 23 – The silliest nerd/fangirl argument you’ve ever gotten into with someone

I've had a few arguments about the legitimacy of this pairing. I feel like this is acceptable, despite the slight illegality of the matter. I'm okay shipping these two regardless.

 

Day 24 – A town, city or village in a fandom of yours that you’ve always wanted to live in

 I want to live in London for lots of reasons. Not just because of Sherlock, not just because of One Direction, and not just because everything cool happens in either London or England. I just want to be here because it seems like an awesome place to be.

 

Day 25 – Do you celebrate character birthdays? If so, tell us about the best character b-day party that you’ve ever thrown!

... I don't know any characters' birthdays. Except the boys of One Direction, but I haven't been in the fandom long enough to go through one. I wouldn't get weird about it, maybe just send a tweet to them because fuck it, I can!

Day 26 – A fandom of yours that you feel is vastly underappreciated

Downton Abbey should more popular than it is. We have canon gays here and everything! I ship Thomas with everything. Everything. Especially the dead lieutenant. And happiness. He needs more of that. My poor, poor, baby...

 

Day 27 – Your favorite meme concerning one of your fandoms

"Otters that look like Benedict Cumberbatch" trended on Twitter therefore I shall call it a meme.

 

Day 28 – Do you have a fandom tattoo? If you don’t and want to get one (or hypothetically wanted to get one), what would it be of?

I'd say the tattoo from above. Or else the tattoo from Mirror's Edge:

Only small and on the side of my ribcage.

 

Day 29 – If you plan on having children, would you name one of them after your favorite characters? If so, explain.

No. That's weird. Even by my standards.

 

Day 30 –The reason why you’re proud to be the nerdy fangirl that you are!

Because when any of my boys smile, I smile too. With my whole heart. I'm not looking at this from simply a fangirl perspective, but from a writer and creator's perspective as well. This is the kind of happiness that I want, as a writer, to be able to give to others. I want people to ship my characters like there's no tomorrow. I want people to feel with my characters, laugh with them, love with them, and cry with them. I think that the fan base for any show, or any band in the case of the One Direction lads, is the most important part of the whole process. I believe it was actually Zayn Malik from 1D that said: "If there's no body supporting you, there's no point." I believe that if people care enough about your work and about your characters to ship them and make a legitimate fandom out of them then you've hit the top. I can't wait for the day that my characters are being shipped and I can browse their tags on Tumblr. That will be so cool.

That's all I'll give you for today. Like I said, I'm going to try to have some more fun with this blog since I'm over the hundred mark here.

I'll talk to you all later!
~Alexandra